11/20/2004

(Almost) Sunday Funnies

Bush Pulls Top Security Agent From Fracas

Several Chilean and American agents got into a pushing and shoving match outside the cultural center where the dinner was held. The incident happened after Bush and his wife, Laura, had just posed for pictures on a red carpet with the host of the Asia-Pacific Economic Cooperation summit, Chilean President Ricardo Lagos and his wife, Luisa Duran.

As Bush stepped inside, Chilean agents closed ranks at the door, blocking the president's agents from following. Stopping for more pictures, Bush noticed the fracas and turned back. He reached through the dispute and pulled his agent from the scrum and into the building.

The president, looking irritated, straightened his shirt cuffs as he went into the dinner. The incident was shown on APEC television.

Here are the photo highlights. The guy with the keychain around his neck and the earpiece is the SS agent:






Bush pulling the guy through.

Glad to see that George W. Bush is so respected. Ha. HA!

Caption it! #1

U.S. Deputy State Secretary Richard Armitage in Toyko.

Where's the Iraqi police?

When I wasn't completely consumed by the work of my job this morniing, I had a chance to hear some blurbs from BBC World Report. One I overheard was that 3/4 of the Iraqi police force in Mosul are gone, nowhere to be seen. I haven't had a chance to check the newswires yet to see if I can find an article verfiying this claim, and since my bed is calling, I won't have a chance to until tomorrow morning. However, I did find this LiveJournal entry from an American contractor in Baghdad which sheds some light on just where Iraq's Mosul police force went.

The Kurdish perspective on Mosul

Noor Al Dien made lunch today, a delicious (and unusually spicy) boiled chicken and potatoes with rice. There are a total of seven staff in the Arbil office today, and we sat down to eat together. We had: Noor Al Dien (that is just his first name, and he is often called simply "Noori"), Goran the sales guy, Goran the tea boy, Soran the driver, and guards Sammee' and Nihad, plus myself. Everyone at this table, save myself, is Kurdish and speaks it natively. Noori, Nihad, and Sammee' all speak Arabic, and Goran Sales speaks both Arabic and English.

Conversations in my office are never simple. This is sometimes a pain in the ass, but I love it. Adversity teaches. In my case, it teaches irritatingly alien languages.

The following conversation is translated from Arabic and paraphrased. I often ask questions from the staff that I already know an answer to, because I like to get a different perspective. Noori speaks an easy-to-understand pidgin with me.

Tyler: Noori, I heard there are a lot of peshmerga in Mosul today.
Noori: Yes. Many.
Tyler: Why?
Noori: Because there are no police there now.
Tyler: Why did the police leave?
Noori: They were all working with Zarqawi. They were no good. The Army of Zarqawi came and the police left. In shaa' Allah (God willing), Zarqawi will die.

Two notes about Loaded Mouth's comments

  • For as long as I can keep the policy in place, there will be no censorship.
  • You reap what you sow.

The Return of the Five O'Clock Follies

I saw this phrase invoked on dKos yesterday, (and a Google search proves how unoriginal my titles are since BOPnews used it 2 days ago). For those unfamiliar with the phrase, during Vietnam, the military would hold a 5:00pm press conference to gloat to the reporters at how great the war effort was going. There was just one problem: We we're losing the war. The reporters, of course, knew this, and knew that they military press conferences were such ridiculous displays of propaganda that they nicknamed them the Five O'Clock Follies.

History is starting to repeat itself. Headline: "Bin Laden Said Unble to Run Operations."

WASHINGTON - Pakistan's military has been so effective in pressuring al-Qaida leaders hiding in the tribal region of western Pakistan that Osama bin Laden and his top deputies no longer are able to direct terrorist operations, a senior American commander said Thursday.

"They are living in the remotest areas of the world without any communications — other than courier — with the outside world or their people and unable to orchestrate or provide command and control over a terrorist network," said Lt. Gen. Lance Smith, deputy commander of Central Command.

Yet the now cutoff-from-the-world bin Laden released his first video taped message in over a year just a couple days before the election. Imagine that.

The article drones on:

South Waziristan, a semiautonomous tribal region along the border with Afghanistan, long has been regarded as one of the most likely hiding places for bin Laden and his deputy, Ayman al-Zawahri, although there has been no solid intelligence to confirm that.

Between 7,000 and 8,000 Pakistani forces have been deployed in a three-pronged offensive in the eastern reaches of the rugged region this month. U.S. military forces remain largely on the Afghanistan side in hopes of capturing or killing any al-Qaida operatives who cross the border.

Military Strategy 101: If you are trying to capture your enemy, make sure they don't know where you've concentrated the forces for your hunt. I mean, fucking duh. That should be Military Strategy negative 101.

Laugh it up, because this is the propaganda we're going to be subjected to for the next few years. The Five O'Clock Follies rides again!

Boy, am I wasting my time studying history or what?

I could be taking a course that teaches me how to be a jerk and get laid!

Class Helps Goody Two-Shoes Get Laid

SAN DIEGO (Wireless Flash) -- They say nice guys finish last when it comes to dating, so a new educational class is trying to teach these fellas how to be bad -- real bad.

The class is called ",b>Badboy Lifestyle: Learn How to Seduce Any Woman Out There" and it's being offered in Europe as well as the U.S.

The three-day workshop costs around $1000 and teaches guys with no game how to become "playaz" by using persuasive lady-catching and keeping tactics.

These strategies include things such as how to be "bad" -- or freaky -- in bed and instructing the goody two-shoes on how to handle multiple relationships at the same time.

Class instructor Robert Tharp says the average bad boy student is in his mid-20s and has minimal sexual experience, but he insists they generally aren't ugly, just very insecure when dealing with women.

The proof is in the pudding. Tharp claims the class so far has gotten 70 percent of its participants laid.

Oi. I'm not quite sure where to begin with this story...

Fark Headline of the Day

"Monica Lewinsky gets her shot to star on reality TV; hopes she doesn't blow it"

Anal Massage, $35.96 -- Only at Target!

Hey, it's on their website.

...holy shit, this isn't a joke. Amazon is selling the Anal Massage DVD. And, no, I don't want it for Christmas.

Light blogging

You know when you can just tell it's going to be a long fucking night at work?

11/19/2004

Election Fraud in Florida

Read what some independent statistical models have to say about election results coming from the use of Diebold and ES&S electronic voting machines in Florida.

Berkeley analysis of Fla. electronic voting finds Bush wrongly awarded between 133,000 and 260,000 votes

A study by faculty and graduate students and led by University of California at Berkeley Professor Michael Hout has concluded that President Bush was likely erroneously awarded between 130,000 and 260,000 votes in Florida alone, with 72,000 of them being in the largely Democratic Broward County alone, RAW STORY has learned.

The survey, which is the most comprehensive and detailed analysis of Florida’s 2004 election results to date, found that compared to counties with paper ballots, counties with electronic voting machines were significantly more likely to show gains for Bush between 2000 and 2004...

“No matter how many factors and variables we took into consideration, the significant correlation in the votes for President Bush and electronic voting cannot be explained,” Hout added. “The study shows that a county’s use of electronic voting resulted in a disproportionate increase in votes for President Bush.

The odds of this occurring by chance?

“Less than once in a thousand,” he said.

Will there be naysayers who disregard this? Of course, since this is only a statistical model and not a definitive smoking gun, many people will deny that this report has any credibility. Those that do such, though, are missing the point: Without documentation specifically pointing to election fraud, there's no way of knowing it happened because the votes on these machines cannot be checked manually. There is no paper receipt and no ballot backup. The fact remains that when you use an electronic voting machine, there's no way to know who you voted for. Anybody who has any concerns about our democracy, Republican or Democrat, should pay special attention to this story.

We all have a right to know who we voted for.

[Hattips: David and Rimone.]

Heh.

Continuing my series of short-posts-because-it-is-busy-at-work-right now, Roxanne is my hero: "Critics of the Clinton Library Need to Shut the Fuck Up."

It's a Beach Party Vietnam Iraq!

You know, Vietnam's elections were delayed at first, too...

Roll up those sleeves and take one in the vein!

Headline: "Afghan Opium Cultivation Reaches Record High-UN."

Stories like this throw me into a fit of mean, horriible, guilt-ridden laughter

Bwwwhahahahaha!

A meteor is coming and we're all going to die: teacher tells pupils

LONDON (AFP) - A schoolteacher, attempting to motivate her pupils into making the most of each day, told them a meteorite was about to smash into the Earth and that they should all return home to say goodbye to their families.

The teacher at the high school in Manchester, only realised her lecture was misjudged when many of the assembled teenagers started crying, The Sun newspaper said Friday...

After the crowd of 13- and 14-year-olds looked on in horror, and many burst into tears, the teacher swiftly explained that she was only trying to encourage them to "seize the day".

Heh.

Hai-yah!

Somebody has decided to put the Matrix into Haiku. I've got something to add to the list.

Wasted my money
On your fucking dumbass film
I want my money back

Well, now I'm feeling artsy today. Anyone up for Starbucks?

Airport security? The GOP says we don't need any stinkin' airport security!

Party like it's September 10th!

Does their mania for doing everything wrong have no end? After spending umpteen millions of dollars to professionalize airport security, we're now going to let airports piss it all away by returning to a low-bid system where airport brass can force patently unqualified screeners to rush potential terrorists through checkpoints in the interest of shorter lines? And they accuse us of "having a September 10 mindset?"

Maybe the GOP could offer all passengers some box cutters before lift off. You know, just in case!

Just something to think about

I've though this post from feministe is about feminism (shock! ;>), I want to rip something she quoted from an Andrea Dworkin interview as something to think about for general political purposes on racism and sexism, and how much of a role they played in this last election. It doesn't mean you shouldn't read the whole thing and learn something, though.

So first ask yourself, "How in the name of fuck could that motherfucker be fucking elected?" Then clear thoughts about Diebold from your mind, read this, and give some more though to that question.

Michael Moorcock: What do you think about the current shift to the right in US politics?

Andrea Dworkin: Here, in blaming and shaming the oppressed, the powerless, the left colludes with the right. There's no reason to look to the left for justice, so people look to the right for order. It's pretty simple. The victory of the right also expresses the rage of white men against women and people of colour who are seen to be eroding the white man's authority. The pain of destroying male rule won't be worse than the pain of living with it.

Poor Huey...

He's pissed.

Light blogging

Work is kind of busy (you wouldn't believe how much some people want to talk in the middle of the night) and I'll be cofiguring some software for the blog.

For quick, positive decisions on torture, just goto Speedy Gonzales

Via Rimone, Ted Rall has a few musings on Alberto Gonzales and just how nuts the guy is. And whether you like Rall or not, how can you argue with a point like this?

Alberto Gonzales ... possesses one of the most twisted minds the American legal system has ever produced...

The military's judge advocate generals (JAGs), not known for squishy liberalism, say that Gonzales is nuts. "It's really unprecedented," says a senior military attorney. "For almost 30 years we've taught the Geneva Convention one way. Once you start telling people it's okay to break the law, there's no telling where they might stop."

Speaking of those Geneva Conventions and people like Gonzales being all for torture, couple that with the Marine shooting this week, how do Republicans think this reflects upon us in the Islamic world? Or hell, just in the world in general. Pointing out how horrible the torture and murder of those kidnapped victims, like Margaret Hassan, is perfectly justifiable. They are horrible. However, how come we're not able to criticize the deaths that have happened at GitMo, or the fact that we don't have a full understanding of what the prisoners there are going through and how they are being treated? When we openly defy the Geneva Conventions and the world knows it, should we expect our enemies to obey those same conventions?

I'm certainly not saying that what are enemies are doing is right, but I want this to be thought about. What most people don't point out is that the Geneva Conventions exist to protect our soldiers just as much enemies we have in our custody. And if we don't hold up our end of the bargain, then we can't expect anybody else to.

An unrelated note about Rall: Capitola sent me this article annoucing that Ted Rall's cartoons were banned from WashingtonPost.com because of last week's tard strip. It insulted too many people. Whoops. Just imagine if the same standards applied to Rall were thrust upon Ann Coulter of Michael Savage... "Liberal media" my ass.

...Rall says a write-in campaign was launched to get him banned from WaPo, and they caved in, of course. I absoultely adore how our freedom-loving right is [ahem] JUST SO TOLERANT OF OTHER PEOPLE'S OPINIONS. Nope, these people would never, EVER seek to censor us simply because we disagree with them!

Dear America, Please grow the fuck up

I wanted to refrain from commenting on the whole Nicollette Sheridan/Terrell Owens bullshit, but the stupidity of the situation has gotten to me. Some things need to be said.

Yes, Moral Values America, this might come as a shock to you, but black men fuck white women! Oooohhhhhh, the horror! And you know what else? Black women fuck white men! Omigod, the sky must be falling! But wait!, I've got another shocker for you: They enjoy it!

Now I realize that the shock of anybody actually enjoying sex might (finally) kick your ass out of the 50s, but.. dun dun DUUUNNNN.. It's true!

And don't give me this shit, "Omigod, the kids saw it! My poor, innocent white children saw it!" Because you know what? You see no problem with letting your kids watch grown men beat the shit out of each other every Sunday and Monday night, so you can take your racist, hypocritical values and shove them straight up your ass.

Seriously, just grow the fuck up.

11/18/2004

Bwwwwhahahaha!

I hadn't read this Daily Pundit comment thread since the 12th, where he calls me a "leftist asshole making a death threat," which is such a priceless quote that I added it to my hall of fame 2 seconds after reading it. But I missed DP's reply to my last comment, which said in part:

Now fuck off. I don't have the patience for your overblown, delicately jumbled lunacies, and I especially don't have patience with death threats. You think I'm kidding? Wait till the cops knock at your door. I've turned your post over to the local constabulary.

UPDATE: They didn't think it was funny, either.

Heh, isn't he cute?! He loves that second amendment, but apparently he still needs a little help with the first.

And I'm still waiting for the cops. Somehow, I don't think they'll be on my doorstep anytime soon...

What a fucking moron.

Delinking and stuff

Thanks to Newswriter's astute comments to this post I made earlier todya, I've come to the conclusion that news from Jihad Unspun is complete crap, so I've delinked it.

I also noticed that a like to Newsmax was directly under that, so since that's also complete crap, they're gone, too.

As for the offensive song titles, with the possible exception of Matt and Jay Tea's entries, these are pretty PG to R rated so far. (Except for that whole corn thing, but there was no song title there.) But, it gives me a good gauge as to what people think is offensive. Which is good, because now I know that if I ever mentioned anything about the other realms of my music collection, I'd be in deep shit.

I may have more to say on this later. But if you just song of another song, leave it in comments. It's an open invitation to try and offend people, for free! What's better than that?!

Fahrenheit 9/12

Guess what movie will soon have a sequel?

GOP bullshit blogging

Remember the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge? Well, it could be coated with black gold soon. The Wilderness Society wants you to write your senator, and they made it simple: Click here!

House Republicans voted in a rule change, allowing Tom Delay to keep his leadership role even if he's charged with a felony again. Could you even being to imagine the outrage from these hypocritical crybabies if Delay was a Democrat and this shit was happening?

What to know where your food came from? Too bad! Republicans aiming to repeal food labeling laws before Thanksgiving.

Dear John

Not to think about me here, but do you realize that I worked my ass off for you on election day? After working my usual midnight-8am shift, I made the 100 mile trek to New Hampshire to do door-to-door campaigning for you. I was already suffering from a mild case of the flu, and since I had a whole 2 hours of sleep on the 48 hours of Nov. 2nd and 3rd, I became even more ill for the next week. In fact, my neck is still painfully sore.

I worked my ass off for you, John. So when I hear that your campaign fund still has $15 million in the bank, I think hard working people like myself deserve an answer on why this money wasn't spent during the final days of your campaign.

Why did you sit on the money, John?

Dipshit.

Sincerely, or whatthefuckever,
tas

Dollars don't grow in trees, but they're falling from somewhere

And here's yet another story about how much the dollar sucks compared to the euro. I still have some savings bonds, given to me by my Grammie from many birthdays and holidays. I can't help but think that while I wait for these bonds to fully mature, they are instead losing their value. And since I'm not ina greement with the war, I'm seriously considering cashing them out and using the money to purchase euros. Any thoughts? Am I think smart or am I just a traitor?

Commenting is still choppy

Speaking as someone who actually donated to Haloscan and, thus, is paying for this shitty service, I'm rather pissed.

I don't want to believe this news source...

[Updated, kind of making this post null and void.]

...but I don't know what to believe anymore. Take a look at this article from Jihad Unspun, a news source whose bias should be obvious. This was printed yesterday.

While fighting in Fallujah has been less intense in some parts and non-existent in others as a new offensive is being formulated, the American occupiers are being forced to fend off constant attacks in many cities across Iraq. A barrage of rockets fell on American bases in Saddam [Yup, they still call it Saddam, not Baghdad International] and Al-Muthanna airports and Eagles Camp yesterday. Attacks in Abu Ghraib [Whu?], Al-Dawrah, Al Souwairah, Al-Radwaniah, and Al-Latifiah cost American occupation forces 36 lives, a Cobra, an Apache, a Reconnaissance plane, and a number of tanks and armored vehicles.

36 lives? That seems awfully high. I like to think that I've been paying attention to Iraq, but 36 soldier's lives in one day? I haven't been able to verify this figure anyplace else, nor have I been able to verify that attacks have happened in the cities that they listed. So I have no reason to trust this news source.

But what if it's true? After looking at some news reports from mainstream sources, I'm not quite sure who to believe anymore. Rimone found a couple links proving that the mainstream press has lied about how many soldiers were injured in Falluja. She's also left comments here about seeing more of the Marine shooting video then we have been allowed to see here in the states. I know it's not much of a revelation to say that the mainstream media isn't telling us the truth, but seeing these latest lies and looking at that war report from a dubious source biased against the US leaves me wondering what, if anything, should I believe.

I'm just saying it because it needs to be said

Elton John sucks.

And Phil Collins? Ditto. He su-su-sucky sucks.

The Death of Margaret Hassan

One of of those things that I haven't acknowledged yet because it seems like everyone else has. So, yes, it sucks and the insurgents who committed this murder are evil.

...Juan Cole has some thoughts on this and the Marines shooting.

To compare them to the murderous thugs who kidnapped CARE worker Margaret Hassan, held her hostage, terrified her, and then picked up a butcher knife ... [omitting the part where he describes her death in detail] ... is frankly monstrous. The multinational forces are soldiers fighting a war in which they are targetting combatants and sometimes accidentally killing innocents. The hostage-takers are terrorists deliberately killing innocents. It is simply not the same thing.

Does it feel a little drafty in here? Part II

Via Capitola, the government starts updating their SSS records.

The Selective Service System (SSS) and the U.S. Department of Education now are gearing up to compare their computer records, to make sure all men between the ages of 18 and 25 who are required to register for a military draft have done so.

The SSS and the education department will begin comparing their lists on Jan. 1, 2005, according to a memo authored by Jack Martin, acting Selective Service director.

While similar record checks have been done periodically for the past 10 years, Martin’s memo is dated Oct. 28, just a few days before the Nov. 2 presidential election, a hard-fought campaign in which the question of whether the nation might need to reinstate a military draft was raised in debates and on the stump.

It took several more days, until Nov. 4, for the document to reach the Federal Register, the official daily publication for rules and notices of federal agencies and organizations.

The memo was also produced after the U.S. House voted 402-2 on Oct. 5, against House Resolution 163, a bill that would have required all young people, including women, to serve two years of military service.

One can only hope that draftees are given a choice in where to serve. "Baghdad, Tehran, or Paris? I'll pick Paris!"

Fark Headline of the Day

"K-Mart to buy Sears & Roebuck for $11 billion, creating the nation's 3rd largest purveyor of crap"

Some more values from the Right

From Alas, A Blog, via Dru Blood:

He's right. Unfortunately, this is also why he can't be the president.

"The media is trained to get the entertainment value and screw the facts." - Howard Dean.

Dissention? Debate? Fuck that!

I wish I could find a transcript of Pat Buchanan on Imus yesterday morning. (The fact that I can make this statement and, if ever so briefly, seek to align myself with this man, just goes to show you how fucked up this country is right now.) I don't normally listen to Imus, but I caught his show yesterday, and he was talking about the reshuffling of Bush's cabinet with Buchanan. Most of you know that Buchanan was a speech writer for Nixon, so while not high up in his administration, he was certainly an insider. And Buchanan had the same complaints about Bush's new cabinet that we see from the left: He's stacking it with a bunch of "Yes" men and women who will do his bidding without question. Buchanan noted that even Nixon knew that debate among administration officials is healthy, and he purposely appointed people to his cabinet who would argue with each other. He made a point to note that Nixon even appointed Democrats.

I never thought I'd see the day when I'd rather have Nixon in office...

Does it feel a little drafty in here?

A Kansas judge told a 24 year old man found guilty of marijuana possession to either goto jail or go into the military.

11/17/2004

But priests from NAMBLA are still okay

A Massachusetts Catholic Church has asked a Democratic, pro-choice state legislator, and life long member of her church, to step down from her position as cantor and children's choir director because of her stance on abortion.

As one dKos commenter points out, if a church is going to take an overtly political stance like this, then they should be taxed.

What are the most offensive song titles ever?

Since I'm wondering what you think, and not what I think, I'll refrain from commenting on this thread. Song titles from any band are allowed.

Go!

Watch commericals or break the law, your choice

That is if this bullshit copyright bill, HR2391, becomes law. There are more important elements to the bill, but I just want to complain about this one first:

The bill would also permit people to use technology to skip objectionable content -- like a gory or sexually explicit scene -- in films, a right that consumers already have. However, under the proposed language, viewers would not be allowed to use software or devices to skip commericals or promotional announcements "that would otherwise be performed or displayed before, during or after the performance of the motion picture," like the previews on a DVD.

Great. What's next, a proposed law that makes it illegal to take a piss when the commericals? Will TVs be rigged to lock the fridge door whenever commericals come on?

What other happy, fun, making-us-all-criminals things do we have to look forward to?

  • "Fair use" will be destroyed, no more artists using samples in songs
  • If you download a song off a peer-to-peer network, congrats, you're going to jail!
  • If you have unpaid for copyrighted material on your iPod, you're going to jail, too!
  • The RIAA and MPAA wetting themselves with glee
  • The prices of movies and CDs continuing to go up as the entertainment industries point to new bullshit reasons for the price increases

Welcome to Bush's corporate playland, kids. Now bend over and take it!

Blah

I'm just not in the mood right now.

Gee, no shit. Does a bear fuck in the woods, too?

Headline: "Shooting in Iraq Mosque Angers Muslims." I think it's going to do a bit more then just cause anger...

The Right-Wing Thought Police

When Glenn Reynolds isn't busy slandering John Kerry and implying that a Marine who is guilty of cold-blooded murder should get a silver star, he's making long posts about known hateful whackos like, uhm, Garrison Keillor. Quoting part of what Reynolds quoted:

Not one to shy away from speaking his mind, Keillor proposed a solution to what he deemed a fundamental problem with U.S. elections. “I’m trying to organize support for a constitutional amendment to deny voting rights to born-again Christians,” Keillor smirked. “I feel if your citizenship is in Heaven—like a born again Christian’s is—you should give up your citizenship. Sorry, but this is my new cause. If born again Christians are allowed to vote in this country, then why not Canadians?”

Well, I guess Democrats aren't even allowed to crack jokes and talk about Bush voters in a frank fashion anymore, now are they? But as long as we all agree with the right that Marnies who shoot unarmed Iraqis should be awarded silver stars, then I guess we will all be normal!

Fuck you, Glenn.

...And Power Line called Keillor's jokes "sick." But laughing at widows and sending 200 trolls at a blog which disagrees with you is OK, right? Fuck you too, Power Line.

How did we ever come to harbor such backwards ass fucking assholes in this country, anyway?

...Two more thoughts:

1) If this isn't the right's typical "Let's take something from nothing and make a problem out of it!" non-problem, then I don't know what is.

2) But I do know what the real problem is: The fact that the right seeks to create problems over meaningless bullshit like this. The irony of seeing fucktards like Reynolds and Power Line bitch over this (It's "sick?" Oh, please) lies in the fact that Keillor's comments are funny because we know there's a ring of truth to them. We know Bush's more fanatical supporters see things in the light he's joking about, and we also know that they want to convert us. Hence, censor us. The right is only enforcing the strength of Keillor's satire when they single him out.

Just in time for Christmas!

The "Girlfriend's Lap" pillow, complete with miniskirt.

Oy...

Last baseball post of the year, I promise

How the fuck did Vladimir Guerrero win the AL MVP award? Didn't his team get trashed in the playoffs by a team that had two players which had more RBIs than him? What the fuck...

Fark Headline of the Day

"In a move sure to make Baby Jebus cry, NBC plans to air 'A Clay Aiken Christmas' "

Dipping into the ole mailbag...

Yesterday, I received some spam from the International Planned Parenthood Federation/FreeChoiceSavesLives.org. Here's how it starts:

You know what worries me? The fact that every network and newspaper in the country is buzzing with news of Bush's new "mandate."

After I read this, I thought to myself, "You know what worries me? The fact that every network and newspaper in the country thinks that Bush getting this narrow mandate is a huge victory, and absolutely nobody is drawing a correlation to the fact that, if you admit that Bush just now has "mandate," then he didn't govern with a mandate for the past four years.

Doesn't this bother anyone?

Anyways, IPPF suggests writing letters to your editor discussing Bush's mandate. I'm not sure how much weight a letter to the editor has these days, but you're welcome to try.

Great

Ever since the War with Power Line, comments seem to work sparodically. And since I'm running into trouble with mysql, I don't yet have no software setup to shift the blog, and commenting, over too. So, in case anyone was wondering... Yes, I know, and no, I don't have a way to fix the problem right now.

11/16/2004

Kill an unarmed Iraqi in cold blood, get a silver star?

Edited title to say "unarmed." It should have said such, but I had five miutes to write and edit the post before going to work, so mistakes happen.]

Via Michael Hussey, it looks like Glenn Reynolds supports just that. In fact, while liberally quoting an article from Newsmax, he goes on to quote their part claiming that Kerry did the same thing and got a silver star (which he didn't), therefore, the Marine in Falluja also deserves a silver star.

Unfuckingbelievable. On multiple levels. Glenn Reynolds, need I remind anyone, is the right's most popular blogger, and this is what he believes? Wow. Just fucking wow. And the right jumps down my thought for comments I made about their vile treatment towards a weeping widow? Just. Fucking. Wow.

This is why the world hates us.

...And before somebody says, "Well, Reynolds and Newsmax got it right! He pulled a Kerry!" Read this comment from Rimone, who isn't in this country.

"are they showing the entire thing in the states? the now-dead Iraqi, in what looks like blood-soaked bandages, saying (w/english translation voice-over) 'i talked to you guys yesterday...' before the marine shoots him? we saw this shit last night (before that i thought Nomad was pulling my leg when i googled and couldn't find anything)."

The FULL story is not being reported in our borders.

You know that guy who lit himself ablaze in front of the White House?

He was a Yemeni FBI informant.

Winning over hearts and minds

Blondesense lists a few reasons why this isn't happening.

More Stuff You Won't See in US Media

Read Dahr Jamail and you'll surely wonder if it's 1984 or 2004.

Dogs are eating bodies on the streets of Fallujah. Anyone can come across the border into Iraq by merely tipping the "guard" $3. Hospitals are ravaged and looted. Doctors arrested. Innocent people killed or arrested.
“I was with a woman in labor. The umbilical cord had not yet been cut. At that time, a US soldier shouted at one of the (Iraqi) national guards to arrest me and tie my hands while I was helping the mother to deliver. I will never forget this incident in my life.” - An Iraqi Doctor in Fallujah.

Meanwhile, back in Darfur...

More of the same, more of the same...

Your tax dollars at work...

...creating more recruitment opportunities for al-Qa'ida.

He said one Marine noticed one of the prisoners was still breathing.

A Marine can be heard saying on the pool footage provided to Reuters Television: "He's f*****g faking he's dead. He faking he's f*****g dead."

"The Marine then raises his rifle and fires into the man's head. The pictures are too graphic for us to broadcast," Mr Sites added.

The Marine is then heard to say: "He's dead now."

Our military is looking into whether not this is a war crime. I'm assuming they won't have to look hard.

...Swopa @ Needlenose has more on what this really means.

From the Department of Worst Case Scenarios, PR division

American soldiers executing unarmed Iraqi prisoners? A war crime, and a public relations disaster.

American soldiers executing unarmed Iraqi prisoners in a mosque? Good heavens. If they were looking to top Abu Ghraib as a way to incite Muslim hatred of the United States, they succeeded.

American soldiers executing unarmed Iraqi prisoners in a mosque on videotape? Well, perhaps Osama bin Laden will die from exhaustion because he can't stop dancing for joy.

This footage will be in every al-Qaeda recruiting tape for the next 10 years. I'd say it can't get any worse, but tomorrow's another day.

Yes, there's always a chance for Iraq to get even worse. Lovely, eh?

What are those damn frogs talking about?

President Chirac insists that Tony Blair got nothing for supporting the United States in Iraq. I don't know what he's talking about, because I'm sure Blair got it on the chin a couple of times.

Bush is getting a lube job

What scares me the most about Bush's attitude is that he never rethinks his policies, nor does he think he has any responsibility for the consequences of his decisions. In fact, if his policies have failed, then he'll waste no time in proclaiming that the have already succeeded with flying colors. Say Bush was trying to fix the reception on his TV, so instead of adjusting the antenna, he hits it. Noticing that it didn't work, he hits it again, harder. And harder. And harder. The reception still sucks, but Bush still won't touch the antenna. Instead, he whips out a sledgehammer and smashes it through the screen while screaming, "MISSION ACCOMPLISHED! MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!" That, folks, is how Bush operates.

It's only going to get worse for the next 4 years. It's bad enough that the Democrats are ready to sell their soul to Harry Reid, their leader who they have publicly compared to Mr. Fucking Rogers, which I imagine speaks volumes about how much the Bush administration isn't afraid of him. What's worse is that the Bush administration is streamlining itself into a well-oiled machine where opposition to the Bush agenda just plain doesn't exist. If you thought things were bad for the last 4 years, wait until we have to live without Colin Powell and the new CIA keeps churning out false intelligence reports that agree with the Bush party line because disagreeing with the man means your ass gets fired. One can only wonder what new "intelligence" the CIA will unearth. Suddenly Sadaam and Osama were good buddies and there are WMDs in Iraq! And Iran has a missile aimed at Washington DC! We better go put a stop to that!

May I suggest taking a seat for the next 4 years? Or if you insist on standing, then clinch those buttcheeks together tightly, because now there ain't gonna be nobody around to slow down Bush when he's coming for your ass.

Well, this explains it

Notice how Iran is being pitched as the new enemy?

The Bush administration sure does work quick. So when do you think the carpet bombing of Tehran will begin?

...More! More!

Talk about leaks! [But not the kind opposed by administration hawks.] This is a superb piece on Iranian mucking around in Iraq. But at 10 pages long sourced at numerous points to US military intelligence documents, one wonders who finds it in their interest to leak such material? Subtle hint: those who want the US to get tough on Iran.

"Fact checking my own ass" b/w "Why make a donation to get the votes counted?"

On 11/12/04, I published "The Unelected Truth," which was an off-the-cuff email I sent to my sister describing how Bush stole the election. That fact doesn't need correcting. :) However, they are a couple things I said which are wrong.

"Along with states passing laws barring felons from voting even after they've served their time, meaning 12% of our black population nationwide simply doesn't have the right to vote period..." This is tricky. Working with information from Fairvote that I have verified in mainstream articles, it's actually 13%... Of black men who can't vote. If we take all black people into account, it's 5.5%. The Fairvote article states, "Nearly 5 million citizens-a hugely disproportionate share of them racial minorities-will not be allowed to vote in next month's presidential election ... Blacks make up 40 percent of the nation's disenfranchised, even though they are only 12 percent of the general population." This 40% is 2 million. The Census says there are 38,749,064 black people in the US, and 2 million of them is roughly 5.5%. However, bringing reality back into the mix, we have to remember that 5.5% is the national average, thus the percent of black who cannot vote will be higher than 5.5% is highly populated states with many large urban areas, like Ohio.

"I have to confirm this, but rumor has it that there are over 200,000 overvotes/undervotes/hanging chads in Ohio this years -- all of them "spoiled votes" from mainly minority communities, votes that don't count." Well, let's confirm that rumor and correct my original figure. The number of spoiled ballots is actually 92,672, as reported by Greg Palast, and also the Cleveland Plain Dealer. Not 200,000, but still a very high number of ballots that came from Democrat-leaning, minority communities.

Along with the 155,000 provisional ballots, these 92,672 spoiled votes are important because it the combined 247,672 votes likely to lean heavily towards Kerry. Since Bush leads the state by only 136,000 votes, there's a chance he could lose Ohio if a proper recount is performed, and thus, get booted from the White House.

Discounting 10% of these as bad ballots, we still have 222,905 left. If Kerry can win 82% of these ballots, then he's the president.

The donation to Cobb and Badnarik goes to pay for a count of the spoiled punch card ballots, as the Cleveland Plain Dealer states: "Some groups have gone a step further: The presidential candidates from the Green and Libertarian parties have said they will band together to demand a recount of all the ballots in Ohio - which could include a review of 92,672 "spoiled" ballots that recorded no vote for president."

But Stephanie asked in a comment, "Will a recount make a difference? They tossed ballots." I didn't know that ballots were tossed, so I did some digging. And while technically it's unconfirmed, an election observer is saying that provisional ballots are being tossed if they don't include a birthdate. Since the provisional ballots are already supposed to be counted by the state, that means that ballots which are tossed won't be counted at all. Why they are being thrown out is beyond me or, for the matter, comprehension, as far as I'm concerned. But we can only hope that this is part of the, say, 10% of provisional ballots that could be tossed. (The 10% is a guesstimate based on figures I heard from this election. This Freeper thread says 87% of Ohio's provisional ballots were counted in 2000, but there's but news -- 34% of this election's provisional ballots in the heavily Democratic Cuyahoga County have been discarded. The election observer said that provisional ballots without birthdays are still supposed to be counted, but a "new ruling" says they shouldn't be counted. The article does not mention if this is a court ruling or what, and implies that the ruling only effects Cuyahoga County. Something smells fishy here...) Sorry I can't have a positive, or even solid, answer to your question, Stephanie.

About the donations: Cobb and Badnarik made the cut to afford the recounts. They are still requesting donations to pay for the administration of this recount effort, which means they will still be accepting donations until reaching that goal.

...J Mann makes some great counterpoints in comments, which I think should be read.

11/15/2004

Recount Ohio Now! Donations needed!

If Kerry's not going to do it, then I'm glad the Green's Daivd Cobb and Libertarian's Michael Badnarik are demanding that Ohio votes be recounted due to irregularities. But they need money to pay for the recount - $150,000 by today. The Cobb Campaign is very, very close, having raised $144,640 so far.

CLICK HERE TO DONATE!

[Due to it's urgent nature, this post has been placed on top for the day.]

This people are insane

This just in from the "You've got to be fucking kidding me" dept.:

John Hostettler, the Congressman representing the 8th district of Indiana, has been convinced by local religious groups to introduce legislation in the House that would change the name of an Interstate 69 extension to a more moral sounding number.

There are plans to extend the interstate from Indianapolis through southwestern Indiana all the way through Texas into Mexico in the coming years. While most believe this highway will be good for the state’s economy, religious conservatives believe “I-69” sounds too risqué and want to change the interstate’s number.

Looks like somebody needs a blowjob.

An analysis of bin Laden's mind

I've had this Pericles dKos diary piece sitting in Firefox all day, and everytime I looked at it, I wanted to read it but just felt to lazy to do so. "Oh, it's too long," I'd whine to myself.

After I stopped whining, I took the 10-15 minutes to read it. And it's definitely a must read for those interested in Islamic history and bin Laden's goals.

As the Iraq War drags on, it is becoming less and less popular. The Afghan War is mostly out of the public view, but to the extent that it also drains American lives and money with no end in sight, it also is losing support among those who are paying attention. The memory of 9/11 is starting to fade, as years without an attack convince more and more Americans that we are safe.

All of these factors threaten Bin Laden's plans. If President Bush is tempted into pulling our troops and TV cameras out of Iraq, Bin Laden loses. He needs the United States to continue playing the Great Satan role, because there are many secular Muslims who still hope to fit into the globalized world economy. He needs an enemy to focus their fear and anger, and only the United States is up to the job.

What's more, if he is going to bankrupt the US economy, he needs a wider war. At this point the US military is stretched thin, so a wider war would require a draft or some other unpopular measure for swelling the ranks. The American public would have to be very, very riled to agree to such a thing.

All of this points in one direction: Another attack on the United States, probably within the next year. Ideally, the trail would lead back to some area where the US doesn't currently have troops, and where there is an attackable enemy. Iran is an obvious choice, if Bin Laden can engineer it. But Syria would work as well, and may be easier to manipulate. Egypt, Pakistan, and/or Saudi Arabia could fill the bill if the attack on the US were coupled with a revolution against the corresponding US-supported government. So, for example, an attack on the US coming from Pakistan could be synchronized with the assassination of President Musharraf to draw American troops into that country.

On that last point, as I've stated many times before, al-Qa'ida came thiiiis close to assassinating Musharraf last year. Do not believe for a minute that this is a weak organization. Just read the whole thing.

More Republican Moral Values

Powell jumps ship

This doesn't come as any surprise.

Think about it

From Pandagon:

Does anyone remember the last time a conservative got in trouble for attacking someone? It was when Donovan McNabb got insulted by Rush Limbaugh. You know why Rush Limbaugh got in trouble? Because he attacked a popular athlete.

Isn't that pretty pathetic? Democrats are labeled as hateful for saying anything about anybody, yet the Republicans can have the likes of Ann Coulter, Sean Hannity, Bill O'Reilly, and Michael Savage, and it's all perfectly OK. In fact, when one of their own gets in trouble; like Savage getting kicked off MSNBC for saying on the air that sodomites should "get AIDS and die," (Savage still has a radio show), Rush being a drug addict, or Bill O'Reilly playing with himself while sexually harassing a former producer of his show over the phone; their friends defend them, not condemn they. They accuse the Democrats of staging a witch hunt, say that their friends have done nothing wrong, or we're trying to censor them, or anything else they can pull out of their ass when their head isn't occupying the hole. They defended Rush, too, claiming that his outwardly racist comment was in no way racist at all, and the liberal media is just out to get him.

Anyone remember the time Bush cracked jokes about how there were no WMDs in Iraq? He showed slides of himself looking under furniture in the Oval Office while his audience yukked up a few laughs. But joking about the nonexistant reason that soldiers are dying? Oh, you know, that's no biggie. But if Clinton, uhm, breathes, then we'll sue his ass!

And hey, let's not forget about our president flipping the bird or Cheney telling a senator, "Go fuck yourself," on the floor of the Senate. You know, no biggies. But if the Democrats dare to question Bush on anything, well then, they're hatemongers!

Amazing. Truly amazing.

The Pandagon post I linked to was partly about this NY Times article profiling Senator Harry Reid, who is likely to become the Democrats new Senate Majority Leader. And judging from the very first paragraph, we might start referring to him as Mr. Softie.

He is a teetotaling Mormon, a former Capitol Hill police officer who opposes abortion and was a cosponsor of the constitutional amendment banning flag-burning. He is a little-known senator from a red state whose considerable skills do not include being a compelling presence on television or behind a lectern.

Oh yeah, he's pro-life, too!

And "close friends" with President Bush.

And a lot of other Republicans.

And he passed out crackpipes to the other 44 Senate Democrats, which is the only logical explanation for how they could possibly think that rolling over and playing dead is the best way to combat the Bush administration.

When will the Democrats learn to fucking fight for once? If you just got smashmouthed, then kick your opponent in the balls. It's a pretty simple fucking concept, and it's about time they started applying it.

Somebody needs a hug

Over at Gadflyer, Cliff Schecter comments on David Brooks' latest New York Times column.

So The New York Times chose Brooks to write a column because he was supposedly a "thinking man's conservative." Is that code for a conservative who actually hasn't been married three times or used a vibrator on his own ass while sexually harassing an employee over the phone? Just wondering.

Heh.

Iran's uranium program has been halted, for now

All thanks to the diplomatic work of England, France, and Germany. Notice anyone missing? The talks between the four nations will continue, and hopefully a full agreement will be reached. This road has been traveled before without success, but now it's time to keep your fingers crossed.

We couldn't see this one coming from a couple kilometers away

Iraq's Deputy PM says the elections could be delayed because of the insurgents. This news comes right on the heels of the US "liberating" Falluja which was, you know, supposed to derail the insurgents.

Must.. Keep.. Head.. From.. Exploding..

One Republican decision I can wholeheartedly support

Via Majikthise, the religious right groups aiming to dispose of Pennsylvania Senator Specter, a moderate Republican who helped bork Bork and is in line to become the chairman of the Judiciary Committee, have acquired a new target: Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum. You know, the uber-conservative, third highest ranking GOP member of the Senate, friend to the religious right Santorum. So why target friends? Well, he committed the high crime of supporting Specter's reelection bid.

So is this the new direction the Republican Party is headed in? If you even slightly disagree with us, then we will destroy you? If so, then good. I hope they keep it up. Let's give the religious right all the power they need to tear the Republican Party apart, because that can only be a good thing.

Fark Headline of the Day

"Men setting up funeral lighting inadvertently create more business for funeral home"

Still think Bush cares about the quality of our intelligence?

Since his handpicked CIA chief Porter Goss began his new career, good, experienced, senior level talent have been resigning because the guy's acting like an asshole, and it as if he could run the talent out of twon quick enough, the White House has ordered him to fire anyone who disagrees with Bush.

Hey, no worries. We can just outsource the jobs!

You know what my favorite Chomsky quote is?

"...But if you read, you'll notice."

Who needs evidence?

From the "I Really Do Hate Democracy" dept.: "Internet post-election rumors missing one little thing: evidence." I looked over this column and decided not to read it. Why? Because it was penned by a columnistin St. Petersburg, a city in a state that undemocratically give the presidency to Bush in 2000. And now in 2004, Ohio undemocratically gave the election to Bush, and it doesn't seem like anybody wants to admit it. So until mainstream columnists who think we don't have evidence print something to the effect of, "Hey isn't it funny that Kathleen Harris was Florida's Secretary of State and state Bush Campaign Chairwomen? And isn't it funny that Kenneth Blackwell was Ohio's Secretary of State and state Bush Campaign Chairman? And isn't it extremely funny that questionable votes in both states gave the White House to Bush?," then I refuse to take them seriously. Because if that's not evidence of voter fraud, then I don't know what is.

Actually, I do. It's blowjobs. Blowjobs constitute the only concreate evidence of voter fraud, just like blowjobs stand (yes, indeed it stands!) as the only credible evidence Republicans ever have for scandals.

Yup, let's find a blowjob in Ohio. Then we'll have a case! I'm off to see a BJ, the BJ of Oz...

The new face of Republican Moral Values

Here's what Power Line reader Ian Massey had to say during this weekend's comment wars.

just as a warning to anyone thinking of taking this douchebag up on his offer, a dust mask soaked in febreze will largely mask the scent of patchouleh and body odor emanating from your average unwashed liberal thug-wannabe. they carry things like rolls of nickels and chains with padlocks as weapons, so when they get within a few feet just shoot them in the kneecap or the stomach. Avoiding the fountains of blood erupting from their wounds would be in your best interest, unless you want AIDS, hepatitis, or god knows what else. After they've choked down their last idiot breath call the fire department and request a hazmat team to scrape the filthy punk/hippie trash off the street, and be sure to post a video or picture of it somewhere that it will get seen, i.e. not here. (unless powerline links this dork again).

You know, I was just thinking that the left is so full of hate...

Who's the Biggest Asshole in Blogging?

Nope, I didn't forget about this, there's just been a lot of news lately. You know, election and all. But I might have to change the name to "Who are the Biggest Assholes in Blogging" and nominate the readers of Power Line, who came out en masse to show their true colors this weekend.

Monday is (sorta) Radio Mouth day!

This week's selection: "I Think She Likes Me" by Treat Her Right. If you're a Morphine fan and you haven't heard this song, download it now. Treat Her Right was Mark Sandman's and Billy Conway's (that's his name, right?) pre-Morphine band, they played a weird mixture of blues, rock, and country that sounded retro but modern at the same time. Ironically, the band has no bass player because Mark played a normal 6-string -- just lined through a bass amp and set low. Billy's drumset consisted of a cocktail drum and a few cymbals attached to it.

If you like the song, you should definitely force someone to get you the Treat Her Right Anthology for Christmas.

11/14/2004

Put down the crackpipe

I'm not going to link to her because I have no interest in participating in another interblog war right now, but here's what a Power Line reader had to say to me in regards to Power Line's role on Loaded Mouth this weekend:

"So I don’t believe your claim that Powerline heralded this attack on you is at all valid."

You know, it must take a lot of practice to be this fucking ignorant.

...Eh, fuck it. I'm sick of her. Go see the stupidity for yourself.

Think about it

Maureen Dowd, via Rimone: "I'm getting more the feel of a vengeful mob - revved up by rectitude - running around with torches and hatchets after heathens and pagans and infidels..."

Sunday is Cartoon Day!

Just one by Ted Rall this week. I think it explains why the blog has received so many comments as of late.